3 Steps to Heal a Broken Heart

Breaking down the wall around your heart
By Bradley Nelson, DC

Can you remember a time in your life when you thought your heart was going to break? Can you remember feeling that sensation often referred to as “heartache”? It may have felt as if an elephant were sitting on your chest, or that you couldn’t breathe. These are common physical sensations that result when your heart—the core of your being—is suffering from a deep trauma.

The heart: more than just a muscle?

In the ancient world, the human heart was thought of as being the seat of love, the seat of the soul, the core of our being, and the source of our creativity. As you might imagine, Western medicine has had no patience for such seemingly quaint ideas. But new research indicates that the human heart is much more than a mere mechanical pump: it seems to be much closer to ancient beliefs than we have imagined.

For example, heart transplant recipients often report strange symptoms, including changes in their music, food, and entertainment preferences, as well as handwriting changes. Some have even reported receiving memories that were not their own. There are thousands of stories of “cellular memory” like these. How is this possible? Is the heart really more than simply a muscular pump? The answer may lie in new technological developments.

It has been proven in the laboratory that your heartbeat becomes instantly measurable in the brain waves of another person when you are focusing love and affection on them. This shows an invisible communication going on between us that we had never been aware of before.

Understanding heartbreak

When you are experiencing deep grief, hurt, or loss, it may be interpreted as an assault on the core of your being, on your heart. These feelings of heartbreak can be so uncomfortable, foreign, and difficult to deal with that they often result in the formation of an energetic “wall” put up to protect the heart from further injury.

Miranda is a perfect example of how a heart-wall can interfere with a love life. She was an attractive 38-year-old nurse who came to me suffering from neck pain. In the course of my examination, she mentioned that she had not dated anyone in years and had no interest in having any kind of a relationship with men anymore. When I tested her, I was not surprised to find that she had a “heart-wall.”

Eight years before, Miranda’s heart had been broken in a relationship with a man she had deeply loved. In an effort to protect her heart from experiencing that kind of pain and injury again, her subconscious mind had created a heart-wall.

Clearing a heart-wall

In Miranda’s case, three lingering emotions had been trapped in her body for all those years, blocking her from experiencing a loving relationship. She had no idea that these trapped emotions were the major underlying cause of the pain she was experiencing in her neck as well. Her neck pain had been going on for some time. It was considered chronic and even a bit mysterious by the other doctors she had consulted, as nothing seemed to relieve it.

One by one, we cleared each of these emotions. I didn’t see Miranda again for about three months. When I did, she looked joyful. I asked her what had changed and she said, “Everything!” She reported that her neck pain was long gone, but there was even better news than that.

“Right after I saw you last,” she said, “I ran into my childhood sweetheart. I hadn’t seen him since elementary school. But it turned out he’d been living right around the corner from me—less than a block away—for almost eight years. We started dating and something really sparked between us. We’re in love! I think he’s going to ask me to marry him.”

The woman who had come into my office complaining of neck pain and swearing off men was gone for good. She was like a completely new person. When their heart-wall is released, people sometimes say it’s like they can finally feel again. They can give and receive love freely for the first time in a long time. In that state, interesting and wonderful things can happen.

Is a heart-wall hampering your ability to give and receive love? Is it interfering with your ability to feel good emotions, or contributing to your feelings of isolation? Is it creating depression, anxiety, or self-sabotage for you? Is a heart-wall interfering with your ability to succeed?

If you are at all frustrated with your love life, your social life, or the level of financial abundance that you’ve been able to attain, a heart-wall may be a big piece of the puzzle for you.

Three Steps to Heal a Broken Heart

1. Write a letter to yourself or another person you need to forgive.

It helps you express angst and negativity that might be in your soul about yourself or another person. It’s helpful, even if that letter goes unmailed.

2. Burn the letter.

Take the letter outside. Light it with a match, burn it up, and send it out to the universe. That can really help you to let go and forgive.

3. Speak forgiveness.

This can be telling yourself or another person that you truly have forgiven yourself or the one who wronged you. This helps seal the forgiveness.

When we withhold forgiveness from ourselves or someone who has hurt us, we may think that we are getting even with that person. We may think that we are hurting that person, but nothing could be further from the truth—we are only hurting ourselves.

When we finally forgive ourselves or that person who has hurt us, the end result is peace for us. Until you forgive, you are not going to be able to have peace.


Bradley Nelson, DC, is an expert in bioenergetic medicine and energy psychology. He developed The Emotion Code, a system for releasing trapped emotions. Visit drbradleynelson.com for more information.